Ask Liz: Do I Have to Invite ALL of Them?

Dear Liz,

How do you manage inviting groups of people like colleagues, sports groups, etc, when some are close friends but you don’t really care about inviting other members (and much less their partners who you’ve only met once and were incredibly rude)? How do you compromise between keeping an intimate atmosphere at your wedding and not ruining your life at work afterward?

Signed, 

Picking Teams

Dear Teams,

My general policy is if you don’t want someone at your wedding, do not invite them. You don’t have to make any excuses, or make any mention of it other than, “Yeah, my wedding is this weekend.” You could be worrying about expectations that they don’t even have – for the most part, people know where they stand with you. Inviting everyone in your office, or everyone on your team might be a nice thing to do, but it’s nowhere near mandatory.

If you are worried about any blowback, though, be honest with yourself. Are you going to resent that they’re there, because you “had” to invite them, that you’re paying for them (and their rude SigO) to be a part of your  memories of your wedding day, forever, along with the resentment you’re feeling? If the answer is no, and you’re willing to shrug it off in the interest of Peace In Our Time, then send the invites. But just remember: You don’t have to. It’s only an elephant in the room if you act like it is.

See you at the end of the aisle,

Liz Coopersmith

Silver Charm Events
www.silvercharmevents.com