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I plan and officiate a fair number of destination weddings here in Los Angeles. L.A. is a prime location, and people from all over the country and the world want to get married a few steps from the beach, or a hop and a skip down the way from Disneyland.
I’m helping a couple in Denmark plan their wedding here in the Fall. We’re still working on finding a location. I’m also planning another event that’s happening next month for a couple that lives here, and they ALSO still need a location. Both need everything else, too. The only difference…is the time difference, but the challenges are the same:
You’ve never done this before: Wherever you are, wherever you’re coming from, this is most likely your first time planning a party for 100+ people. When you’re starting something new, there are a few things that will trip you up before you figure it out, whether it’s having to add tax and service to food and beverage minimums, or understanding how far away Calabasas is from LAX. And can that price actually be right, how is that possible? The first venue, the first photographer, the first caterer you talk to might not (and probably won’t) work, no matter how great they look online. Keep going: But, none of them are the last option you have. You’re in unfamiliar territory, and you have to learn how Wedding World – and rush hour traffic – works. It’s frustrating, but it’s also a process.
Emotions are HIGH: You want to create a wonderful wedding. And that never happens fast enough! There is so much pressure to have a perfect day, and a perfect planning experience. Why is this so hard? Are you doing this wrong? Are you running out of time? What if you can’t find a dress you love? Are your friends and family judging you because you haven’t sent out invitations, yet?
At some point, maybe at several points, it starts to look and feel like a disaster that’s not going to happen. Deep breath: You’re doing lot better than you think you are. When you find yourself feeling like you’re completely screwed, make a list of what you’ve already accomplished, even if it’s something like crossing three potential venues off the list.
I’m not going to tell you the pressure, or your fear and stress aren’t real – you get to have your feelings. My point is that you can manage manage those feelings until you get to the other side of a signed contract: Think about how cool it will be to be done with all the searches, and be able to just enjoy the day with your family, friends, and an open bar. It’s important for you to believe that you will find what you need, not matter how much reality seems to showing you differently. You’re almost there. You are always almost there. And don’t be afraid to ask for help, no one plans their wedding alone.
Every wedding starts out as a blank canvas. Every couple has a ton of choices on how they want to fill that up. Everyone goes through it, and everyone gets through the other side, happy in the middle of a full dance floor. It’s there waiting for you, trust me.
See you at the end of the aisle,
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